The usual objection is that the dead are 'already in heaven or hell' so what is the 'use' of praying for them. First, the Bible does not say this. According to the Bible the Final Judgement will take place at the Second Coming of Christ, when all the dead will be raised (Matt 25:31 ff.,John 5:28-29, 1 Cor. 15). The righteous dead prior to the Second Coming are said to be in Paradise (Luke 23:43), not in Heaven. Paradise is a name for the Garden of Eden, a place of happiness and communion with God, but not the same as Heaven, which is the very throne of God. Likewise the unrighteous dead are said to be in Hades (Luke 16:23), not Gehenna, which is the Greek word used of the place of punishment following the Last Judgement (for ex. Matthew 18:9).
St. Paul speaks of his friend Onesiphorus in terms which suggest he is dead, so his words 'may the Lord grant him to find mercy from the Lord on That Day' are a prayer for the dead, cast in terms of a judgement on the Last Day (2 Tim. 2:16-18, 4:19). In 1 Corinthians 15 St. Paul even cites some Christians' being baptized on behalf of the dead, a practice which did not continue long in the Church but which does indicate a belief that the living may offer to the Lord their concern for the dead; the Apostle sees it as an example of our belief in the Resurrection. (1 Cor. 15:29). In 2 Maccabees we read: 'if he were not expecting that those who had fallen would rise again, it would have been superfluous and foolish to pray for the dead. But if he was looking to the splendid reward that is laid up for those who fall asleep in godliness, it was a holy and pious thought.(2 Maccabees 13:44). (If 2 Maccabees is not in your Bible, I will say here only that it was in the Old Testament used by the apostles and all Christians until the sixteenth century.)
It's interesting that no one ever asks me why we pray for any other category of people. By a simplistic logic we could say that the living have freedom and can only be saved if they are willing to be, and God knows their needs better that we do, so why pray for them? But Christians know instinctively that God's mind is deeper than this and that our prayers make a difference, both for those we pray for and ourselves. The Lord teaches us to pray as a child speaks to his father. Some of our requests will be granted and some will not (cf Mark 10:35ff) but He never suggests that there are things or people we must not pray for. There is much that we do not understand about death and judgement, but to think that God would scold us for loving someone and offering a prayer for him is very strange.
But the question about prayer for the dead raises another question that is even more important. This is the implication that prayer is made to persuade God to do something that He otherwise does not want to do. This is never the purpose of Christian prayer, whether for the living or the dead. All prayer must be prayer for His will to be done. And He does want all men to be saved. The purpose of our prayer is to learn to know Him by dialogue with Him, to join our will with His, to receive the wonderful privilege of sharing through prayer in His redeeming work. I pray for my family who are still alive not only when there is some need but even when all is well with them. Likewise when I pray for the dead it is not because I think they might be condemned but for my prayer. It is a joy to pray for them because prayer is a way of uniting myself with them in the Lord.
This 'use' of prayers for the dead is expressed very beautifully by Fr. Jon Braun. He says that when he was a child they prayed for each member of the family each night and especially for his mother during her illness, but after her death her name was never mentioned in their prayers, and he thought of her less and less. He says that it was as if she then ceased to be a member of the Church. After he became Orthodox he began to pray for her regularly and she again became a part of his life. 'For I am sure that neither death nor life ... shall be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord' (Romans 8:38).
© 1987 Fr. Paul Yerger – Reprint Information